Mompinions... Another way of looking at it all

Motherhood really changes us...

2010-02-20T10:07:00.005-05:00

I said at the beginning that motherhood changes the way we see things. And in the past few months I've come to realize just how true that is.

Becoming the mother of not one, but two children delivered directly into their Maker's hands has monumentally changed my outlook yet again.

I don't know why I came here now to write this, and I sincerely apologize if you arrived expecting movie reviews and discussions of favorite kitchen cleaners. But if you've come here at all, there's a reason, and the Spirit is leading me to share the truth of my experience. I don't know if it's ironic or appropriate that I begin this on the eve of the first Sunday of Lent, but humbly I invite you to tread with me as I share my journey through the only desert my life has ever known.

Part I

Approaching the Desert...

I guess the story really begins a little over 6 years ago when our first son was born. The pregnancy was uneventful, and I was as naive and paranoid as any first-time pregnant woman would be... but oh, I was joyful. It was when the time came for labor and delivery, that things went downhill. I was having no noticeable contractions, but had gone to the hospital because I felt perhaps my water had broken, although it seemed to be a pinhole. When the nurse confirmed I was indeed leaking amniotic fluid, the tears began to flow. When they told me I'd labored too long and would be prepped for a c-section, I was hysterical. When the head of anesthesiology came to apologize because they'd administered the wrong drug to my epidural for the surgery, I was paralyzed with fear. When I realized I had some real paralysis in my leg, that my son was losing weight and turning yellow, and that I'd somehow have to figure this all out very quickly, the despair set in.

With the help of my God, my husband, family and friends, I made it through. WE made it through. Our little boy was laid-back, affectionate, and smart despite his mother's fits of hysterical crying and obsessive worry. The feeling in my leg returned miraculously overnight about 8 weeks after the birth, and the week after that I returned to work, confident this was the way I could have it all.

But then the dry season began. I began to lie awake at night with worry of ridiculously impossible things, things I couldn't control. And this was an all too familiar feeling, one I could remember experiencing as young as 5 years old. I began turning the car around a mile from home to go back and make sure all of the burners in the stove were turned off and the door was locked. I wouldn't let my husband out alone on a rainy night. And I wondered why. Not why I was doing all of that but why life was worth it at all when it was so filled with peril. I withdrew from my friends, shopped like crazy, and wondered if I could really find the strength to drive my car off the highway and into a telephone pole at full speed. Because that plan wasn't something I'd just say sarcastically to anyone who asked about how I was handling the stress of being a new mom, working and moving into a new home... it was very real to me. Something I longed for.

Looking at the smiling face of my son, feeling his kisses on my cheek and nose.... convinced me I needed to try to get that plan out of my head. And so I sought help. Unfortunately it wasn't really the help I needed. The first counselor I happened upon gave me an inkblot test and after a few weeks of appointments in which I just cried and told her my story, she delivered the results of that test. "You're not depressed," she said. "You're just a drama queen."

Despite a mis-diagnosis, my depression seemed to have been talked-out of me and some life changes, like quitting my job and staying home with our 15-month old, seemed to make me feel like my old self again.

This was the first oasis.

(to be continued...)

Oops!

2009-05-30T16:00:00.000-04:00

Gah! I'm a lousy blogger. I've been working on integrating a blog into my site at withlovefrommom.com and it's coming soon! No, really this time!

In the meantime, I've got lots to blog about my kitchen... www.pennypinchinkitchen.blogspot.com

Come visit!

A new home for another passion

2008-10-28T23:53:00.003-04:00

I have some new Mompinions to post! Had some coupons and tried a few household things I must post about, but speaking of coupons...

I wrestled with writing about my grocery budgeting and planning here, or giving it a new home, and I've decided to give it it's own little corner of the web more for my organizational purposes than anything else, but if you'd like to check that out too, please visit me in my Penny Pinchin' Kitchen: http://pennypinchinkitchen.blogspot.com

At a standstill... or maybe a crossroads

2008-08-12T00:38:00.002-04:00

Ok, I'll admit it. I have some writer's/artist's/creator's block. And it all stems from a lack of organization. Having never been one of my strengths, getting organized with all my crafty things is a daunting task, at best. Trying to do it economically... well, it leaves me paralyzed.

I know there are all sorts of tips out there about how to store beads in things like leftover baby food containers. In fact, if you search a certain auction site for bead storage, you'll find people selling their cleaned-out (I would hope) Gerber plastic containers. Not even the jars, folks! USED disposable plastic! For sale! But, assuming this is desirable to one, once one acquires all those little odd-shaped plastic containers, how does one store THOSE? My experiences in purchasing baby food tells me that they don't always stack so nicely. One little bump of the wrist and there would be containers all over the craft room.

For a long while, I was considering nuts and bolts cabinets from the hardware store. They were economical for the amount of stuff they could stash, and not wholly unattractive when taken out of their garage context. But then I attended a craft show where I wanted to work during down-time, and I had no planned projects, so.... well... I took everything. Every last bead I own. It was a mess. So if my beads are in those drawers, what agony will I have to choose what to take on the road? This is yet another conundrum that is quite easy to overcome for some, but for me... I don't know, it just makes the whole system seem undesirable. Not that I ever want to tote my entire stash again, but when I have to take with each bead its price and vendor from which I obtained it so as to know how to price my work... well, taking stuff out of those drawers becomes cumbersome.

So on and on I've gone, searching for the perfect storage, but to no avail. Currently my beads are stashed in plastic baggies and then into Ziploc containers by color, type, or what have you. Those containers, in turn, are stored in a dilapidated and leaning rolling scrapbooking tote, which, with the influence of the slightest breeze, dumps all of my treasures onto the kitchen floor. And since the beads now occupy my paper storage, all of the scrapbooking paraphernalia of which I used to be so fond is now in a heap on my sewing table. Thus, my sewing table is useless for sewing and my poor daughter's room is screaming for real girly curtains for which I have the fabric but not the room to sew!

Gaaaah! Do you see my plight? What messes I get myself into. Well, in any case, when I find a solution, y'all shall be the first to know ;)

All kinds of new directions

2008-07-28T14:26:00.002-04:00

A week ago I took a fabulous class in Precious Metal Clay. This clay (known as PMC) is silver particles mixed with cellulose and water and is used to make... well, anything you want to make out of silver! Basically, you form and dry the clay and then fire away the cellulose and water, and you're left with fine silver.

I had a blast at the class and am looking forward to bringing PMC pieces to my collections. I'm most excited about being able to make my own rosary parts! But to keep things simple, I made a heart pendant and earring dangles at the class.

Stay tuned to see what else I come up with. And I also want to take the time to mention Buttercup Beads in Pottstown, PA. It's my favorite local bead store, even though it's almost an hour from my home. If you're ever in the area, stop by and visit Andrea, Carly and the rest of the wonderful gang, including the brilliant artist Carol LePage who taught the PMC class. Thanks ladies!!!

A new earring display

2008-07-21T15:40:00.002-04:00

My craft fair displays are a work in progress. Previously, my table was full of picture frames in which I had mounted window screen and backed with scrapbook paper. I used wire s-hooks I made myself to suspend my rosaries and necklaces, and I hooked earrings through the screens as well.

It makes for an eye-catching display, but the earrings often got caught in the screen and it made people reluctant to pull them out and try them. Also, the rosaries covered a lot more space and drew the most attention. I think most shoppers hardly even noticed I offered jewelry as well. So I'm working on balancing out my display. I still plan to mount my feature rosaries in the frames, but I'm looking for other solutions for jewelry.

The first thing I tackled was earring display. I found a 2x2 scrap of wood in the basement and some balsa strips I'd bought for kite-making. I drilled 3/8" holes halfway through the 2x2 (the strips were 3/8" wide) and pushed the strips down into the holes. They are snug enough that I didn't need any nails or adhesive. I then cut down 2 more strips to fit the span, and then hot-glued them to the standing strips. Finally, I painted the whole thing to match my logo's color-scheme.

I plan on marking each "ladder rung" with a price point and hanging the earrings accordingly.

Hi, My name is Momma, and I'm a magazine-a-holic

2008-07-16T13:37:00.002-04:00

Look in any room in my house, save maybe the kids' rooms, and you'll find stacks and stacks... and stacks... of magazines! And catalogs! Can't forget the catalogs.

It's an addiction. I can't help myself. Whether I'm waiting in the checkout at the grocery store, buying something online where they offer you that little checkbox to opt-in to their mailing list, or getting a mom's night out at a book and coffee shop, I have to get my hands on those glossy pages. I'm not sure when it started, or why it's grown into such an obsession for me, but, next to crafting and sleeping, flipping through a magazine or catalog is the most relaxing activity I can find. And I love it because it's portable, takes up little space, is quiet (aaaahhh) and requires little thought if I just want to look at the pretty pictures.

I really look forward to the evenings when the kids are in bed, hubby is busy in the garage, and I can flop on the couch, turn off the tube, and immerse myself in whatever I decide my hobby is that day. So in many years of magazine collecting, I've come up with a few faves.

1) Southern Living
Yes, I'm a yankee, but this is still by far my favorite! It just has everything a homemaking Mama could want... beautiful decorating, awesome food, fabulous entertaining, dreamy travel, luscious gardens... and all with that aire of southern sophistication and hospitality. Why isn't there a northern equivalent? The closest I get is the "mid-atlantic" supplement that comes with my subscription. But anyway, I have issues of this mag dating back 8 years since my hubby noticed my fascination with his Southern landlady's subscription. I just can't part with them. A Southern Living recipe has never failed me, so I've even subscribed to their annual cookbooks! Though, in the past year, I've given that up since most recipes can now be found on the website :) And any future vacation will be planned with a S.L. travel article at the ready. Sorry Chicago and Salt Lake, I'm headed south!

2) Everyday Food
I got turned on to Everyday Food (a publication of the Martha Stewart empire) a couple of years ago when some users of another journal site formed a group just to chat about each issue! I figured it must be good if it warranted its own community. So I picked up an issue at the grocery store, took it home, and promptly found myself back at the grocer's buying some simple ingredients to try out the recipes. And try I did! I cooked every single recipe in that issue, and they all got rave reviews for their simplicity, practicality, and of course, taste!

3) Fitness
I recently re-subscribed to this publication. I'm admittedly a fitness failure, although my biggest problem is motivation rather than lack of knowledge. I find that Fitness helps me, however, in both areas. The information makes exercise seem actually doable for a beginner. I think the tone of the articles isn't condescending, but truly encouraging. Trackers and planners on the website are also very helpful and their usefulness was the reason I decided to resubscribe.

So those are my top three. What are your favorites?

Product Review - Fresh Brush MAX

2008-07-11T21:00:00.002-04:00

Scrubbing Bubble Fresh Brush MAX (an SC Johnson product)

A few weeks ago while skimming the couponsin the Sunday paper, I found a great offer that gave me incentive to try out this new product from Scrubbing Bubbles. This line of cleaning product is the one I fall back on whenever I find myself staring dumbfoundedly at the myriad of brands in the supermarket's cleaning aisle. It's been a trusted workhorse for me in bathroom cleaning, a task that I don't so much dislike, but rather at which I feel completely inadequate.

So, while I'm generally against the needless waste produced by these types of disposables, when I found a coupon that, matched up with an in-store sale, made the Scrubbing Bubbles Fresh Brush MAX free, I figured it wouldn't hurt to pick one up and try it out.

The kit I purchased came with a wand and two cleaning pads. Now, I'm not one for reading directions, so following suit, I tossed those in the trash with the packaging and proceeded to attempt to assemble the device. I found it to be not very intuitive, and on my first try cleaning the toilet bowl, the pad dropped right in. I managed to get it hooked back on and finish the cleaning. It was like any other cleaning product and didn't do any better or worse than my regular toilet product and trusty brush.

On the second attempt, I was more successful at getting the cleaning pad attached, but I found it left blue residue and streaks long after I rinsed the bowl. It also seemed to drop blue cleaning residue on the floor, was difficult to drip dry and dripped more blue all the way to the trash can.

Following the use of this second and final free pad, I just threw the handle in the trash with the rest of the disposables, because as far as I'm concerned, it's not worth the expense or the waste to purchase again.

(FWIW, I typically use Scrubbing Bubbles Toilet Bowl cleaner and quite like it. For most other cleaning tasks, a solution of vinegar and water is my favorite.)

And now for the pictures...

2008-07-11T16:53:00.009-04:00

Oops... so as usual, life got in the way and I didn't get to finish my thought. So here is a little gallery of sorts of some of my work.

This Mom's got a lotta love to share

2008-07-06T10:40:00.002-04:00

Bad grammar aside, my little piece of the American dream is called With Love from Mom. You can find me at http://www.withlovefrommom.com or shop directly at http://www.withlovefrommom.etsy.com .

What it's all about, my friends, is a little dream and a prayer. I love to craft. No, I'm downright addicted to it. But I'm a stay-at-home Mom and my crafting addiction nearly led to a craft budget crisis. It's not like I don't have plenty to do with my day, so spending my husband's hard earned income, and my kids' college funds, on piles and piles of fabric, scrapbook paper, and beads that I found little time to get to was just so unfair.

But for those who craft, or anyone who has a hobby, you know what a release it is, what a need you have to express something with the work of your hands. For me, it's calming. And when an astute young seminarian recommended I try making twine rosaries as an economical crafting outlet that would do double duty as a conduit to better prayer, I was hooked... or knotted, I guess :)

As it so happened, about that time I was needing to get out of the house after having had my second child and staying at home full-time. So I took a little class at a local craft chain store and learned how to chain beads together with wire. After the class, as I browsed the aisles looking for beads to take home and practice, I seemed to see everything in groups of six and ten, so the first stash of beads I took home became a rosary... and so it has continued.

My business, then, has a three-fold mission. First, my goal is to pray more. I'm happy to report that I'm pleased with my progress in that area, but have an infinitely long way to go. Second, I want to support both my crafting habit and those who are called to vocations. Again, these things are going fairly well. In 6 months, I've raised over $100 for my cause, and haven't spent a dime of our family budget beyond the wee bit of capital with which I started (and believe me, it was a WEE bit). Third, and finally, I hope to inspire... through the inspiration given me by the Holy Spirit and worked into the chains of beads I produce... someone who wouldn't be so inclined to pick up a rosary, to do so, and to fall deeply in love with a devotion that has provided so much strength in my life.

Now that I've talked enough, I'm off to help another blogger with some code, and then I'll be back with my little gallery :)

It's been a while...

2008-07-06T10:33:00.002-04:00

Yes, it is now the 4th of July holiday weekend, and I haven't posted since, um, March. I'm a little slow on the update of these new fandangled technologies (well, no, not really... but hey, I'm busy) but I've caught the blogging bug.

There's just so much going on, isn't there? We've got an election coming, for starters. I won't bore you with my political leanings, really, just maybe a casual observation or two now and then.

My kids are just, wow, growing too fast. Too dang fast. And they're funny. Parent or not, those "out of the mouths of babes" stories are usually too good to pass up, so I'll try to stop by more often with those. I've been trying to come up with cute nicknames to call my kids here to protect their privacy (and possibly protect them from blackmail as they age)... so going forward, it'll be Bean and Beanette. Ok, so not that cute, but it's hot in my office and I'm losing patience for my lack of creativity.

And, confession time, I run a little home business. It's been slow growing, and my ideas just seem to burst forth faster than I can afford to put them into production. So my frustrations, achievements, and wonderments about how to run this whole show will probably end up catalogued here. A little intro to that in my next post.

Shall we proceed?

Let's start with a movie, shall we?

2008-03-15T01:41:00.003-04:00

My entire family was recovering from a stomach bug today. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't food poisoning, though I did the requisite scrutinization of the fridge contents and self-blame game anyway. I would say it's a virus if one kid comes down with it Tuesday morning, and the other child and 3rd child (aka husband) on Wednesday while I have the joy of cleaning it all up and then not getting it until Thursday, wouldn't you? But I digress... already...

So to treat ourselves for making it through all of that, not before an ER visit with one dehydrated little boy, mind you, we decided to have a family movie night. I made the executive decision to choose the movie because I was not going to sit through another episode of Thomas the Tank Engine, Dora, or Dragon Tales. And heaven forbid we go to Blockbuster and get something other than Thomas and the Magic Railroad. (Have you seen that? Ugh... we'll discuss later.)

Anyway, we got Bee Movie, and I'll say that I was fairly happy with it. The Mom-critic in me gives it 3 out of 4 stars. The real movie fan in me says more like 1.5 out of 4.

The film met my criteria for a good family-night flick:
1) it kept the kids entertained
2) the plot was easy to follow as I fetched food and drink on demand
3) laughs for the grown-ups
4) nothing too risque for little eyes
5) I didn't have to think, or explain a whole lot to my inquisitive eldest child

Now would be a good time to tell you that my kids are 4.5 and 2 years of age. The 4.5-year-old has always been discriminating about his movies. The two-year-old watches anything that's on the tube. My husband (who I love dearly so I've made my last joke at his expense above), is a serious movie buff. Serious. So I'll also tell you he didn't like this movie... maybe 1 out of 4 stars.

But as I said, my Mompinion is that it is a safe and fun film for the family. I liked the take on the exploitation of bees, the little neatly packaged ecology lesson, the humor of the whole bee world. The voice-overs were great (how many did you recognize?) and the whole look and feel was, well, just entertaining. Where the film loses ground for my inner film critic, is in the fact that the plot skips a whole lot of steps as it goes along. For example, one minute Vanessa is freaking out about talking to a bee, and a few short scenes later, she's helping that same bee draft a lawsuit. Gee, how'd we get there? But then the Mom-critic appreciates that same aspect. Kept things moving and fast enough to keep me from having to answer the endless barrage of questions I'd been getting lately while watching, reading, or really doing anything.

And that little ecology lesson... I'll say my kids probably didn't know a whole lot about bees before this other than to try to stay away from them. So since Spring is soon upon us, we'll build on what we saw here and have some fun with it when we get to go outside.

But what's that forecast for the weekend? Rain, rain and more rain. And bees can't fly in the rain.

Welcome to my world!

2008-03-15T01:22:00.004-04:00

Lots of folks call me Momma, or just Mom. You can too... I don't mind :) Only 2 of those people really have a biological reason to, anyway. I'm home with those two most all day, every day, and life has changed totally since that came about.

I look at everything differently now: movies, the news, music, driving, vacations, money, friends, religion, my husband.............. myself!

Sound familiar? Well, if you're looking to make some sense of it or carve out your niche in the life of a mother, grab a cuppa coffee, and join me. We'll take a close look at it all, and maybe... just maybe... make the world a better place for those looking up at us.